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 I'm The Trashman, THAT'S MY THING
Kaleb
 Posted: Jun 14 2017, 11:26 PM
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Anti-Fun Brigade
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 494
Joined: 29-December 15
Age: 24
Location: inside your heart
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Never, in the brief recorded history of mankind, has there been any mention of beings more divine than the Creation Trio and their antithesis, the Goddess of Chaos. But there was a time, before man could write, when a being far more powerful than any god existed. A power so great and foul that men took strides to strike his name from existence after it fell, so tremendous and awesome that it inspired fear with just a mention of it's name.

A creature unlike any other, with dark ambitions and ever fouler abilities. It's name was Zos'ddhal Z'ohk, The Ruinous One, Sower of Woe, Living Damnation of Man and Beast. After thousands of years sequestered in his prison of the soul, Zos has finally regained a form upon the earth, and he has been hell-bent on recovering his lost glory and amassing an army of human slaves large enough to conquer the domains of the lesser gods and reclaim the power that was robbed from him. To this end, he has...

Had children dig in dumpsters for cool things. In one of Nacrene's alleys, Zos floats impatiently over a large dumpster, watching over one of his subordinates as she sifts through yesterday's garbage looking for anything that might be useful, or cool, or tasty. The weirwood Phantump seems to be growing impatient, though, as he continues to sigh loudly.

"CHEL, YOU'VE BEEN IN THAT GARBAGE RECEPTACLE FOR NEARLY TOO GODDAMN LONG. HAVE YOU FOUND ANYTHING YET?"

As soon as the ghost is finished, a head pokes out from under the refuse. A young dark-haired girl, maybe not older than ten, grins at her master with half of a pizza crust lodged in her teeth. "Yef mafter! I've founf sumfinfg fweally coo!" Biting down onto the snack, Chel gulps it down quick, shaking her head once. "I mean, yes master, I found something really cool! Cheeeeeck out... THIS!" Her arm shoots up out of the dumpster, clutching something metallic and shiny. Zos moves in, eyes widening as a grin comes to his face.

"OH, VERY GOOD. I LIKE THIS... YES... YES! IT'S PERFECT! WITH THIS, NOBODY CAN STAND IN MY WAY! ALL WILL SUBMIT TO THE DARK WILL OF ZOS'DDHAL Z'OHK, OR FACE THE WRATH OF MY... MY... UH..."

Chel grins, holding the object in one hand. "It's called a pistol, Master Zos!"

"I KNEW THAT! SHUT UP!"

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Steven
 Posted: Jun 14 2017, 11:30 PM
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Marquis of Asses
Group: Limeade Lord
Posts: 463
Joined: 29-December 15
Age: 24
Location: Somewhere Else
Awards: 1





It's a normal day at the Cafe, except when Lei glances outside, there's a bunch of weirdos throwing trash everywhere. Lei takes a deep breath, then opens the window just enough so she can be heard out of it. "Hey! HEY! Get outta there!"

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Kaleb
 Posted: Jun 14 2017, 11:54 PM
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Anti-Fun Brigade
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 494
Joined: 29-December 15
Age: 24
Location: inside your heart
Awards: 1





Both heads snap to where the sound was coming from, Zos narrowing his woody eyes at the window above them. With a frown, he holds his stubby arms out to either side, staring at the glass.

"YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO! SUBMIT TO MY WILL, MORTAL, AND COME JOIN MY ARMY!"

"Isn't it kind of hypocritical to say you can't be told what to do and then tell someone else what to do?"

"SHUT UP CHEL."
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Steven
 Posted: Jun 15 2017, 12:15 AM
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Marquis of Asses
Group: Limeade Lord
Posts: 463
Joined: 29-December 15
Age: 24
Location: Somewhere Else
Awards: 1





"Okay, but you're getting trash all over our property!" Lei's not gonna say that she refuses to leave the cafe, not at all. Even sticking her head out is a bit too much. "Leave or I'm gonna have Snease come out there!"
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Team Ventus Vickie
 Posted: Jun 15 2017, 01:17 AM
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Leader of Team Ventus
Group: Team Ventus
Posts: 59
Joined: 12-December 16
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Awards: None



Man, what a great day! The birds were singing, the sun was shining, the sky was clear...nothin about this day was all that bad! Man, it sure would be a good day to do some good-old fashioned....

"HEY, HEY, HEY! What the fuck, man? This is my receptacle!" From the street, the leader of Team Ventus, Vickie, ran into the alley. Held over their shoulder was an old-timey hobo bindle on a stick. And boy, they looked pissed. "I thought the vagrants and I had an agreement! This is my territory! You, girl!"

Vickie pointed at Chel as they shouted, clenching their other hand into a tight ball. "Whatever you picked out of the bin, that's mine. That was always mine. You and your young hoodlum ne'er-do-well friends need to get the fuck outta here."
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Gordy
 Posted: Jun 15 2017, 11:59 AM
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The Worst Trainer
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Joined: 30-December 15
Age: N/A
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Awards: 3





"Hey, what's going on over here?"

Marlon was there! He smiled broadly and waved to the people as he walked closer to them. He seemed pretty calm, despite the fact that a ghost was wielding a gun.

So, why was Humilau City's Gym Leader now on the other side of the region, in Nacrene?

Anyway. "What are we all talking about?"

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Kaleb
 Posted: Jun 15 2017, 11:48 PM
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Anti-Fun Brigade
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 494
Joined: 29-December 15
Age: 24
Location: inside your heart
Awards: 1





Shit, looks like they've drawn unwanted attention. Zos looks from Chel, back to the window, to Vickie, to Marlon, then back to the window, then back at Marlon, then at Chel, then at Vickie, then back to Marlon, then at the window, then at Chel, then at the window, then at Chel, and then finally at Vickie.

"SHIT. CHEL, WE ARE LEAVING THIS PLACE POST FUCKING HASTE. SHOOT OUT THAT WINDOW, THEN NINJA US THE HELL OUT OF HERE."

Chel grins wide, saluting with the barrel of the pistol. "You got it, o dark and horrible one!" Haphazardly aiming upward, Chel sticks out her tongue and palms the gun, firing off an ear-splitting shot into the glass that guards everyone's favorite shockrat. After that (and the exaggerated recoil), Chel then reaches behind her back, throwing down something that explodes quickly and fills the alleyway with smoke.

Something bumps Marlon and Vickie, and the sound of a sewer grate being moved around can be heard in the confusion.

Once the smoke fades, it's clear another crime has been comitted.











Vickie's helmet is gone.
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Gordy
 Posted: Jun 16 2017, 02:07 PM
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The Worst Trainer
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 2038
Joined: 30-December 15
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Awards: 3





Oh. Oh darn. Well. Well, this isn't good. Oh my goodness.

Marlon's first instinct isn't to follow the criminals. Instead, it was to check out the sewer grate and see what was making the noise. Maybe it was related to the mystery of the missing helmet.

Marlon casually walked over to the grate, then lifted it up. It was heavy, but he managed to pull it up and slide it to the side. Then he looked down the hole, looking for any evidence.

He turned to the others. "So, I have a few questions as to what's going on. But let me ask you all one first: who wants to explore the sewers with me?"
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Team Ventus Vickie
 Posted: Jun 16 2017, 03:02 PM
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Leader of Team Ventus
Group: Team Ventus
Posts: 59
Joined: 12-December 16
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Awards: None



Man, this was outrageous! Vickie was...well, outraged! Initially, they tried to shout some obscenities, but the smoke caused them to let out some strangled coughing noises as they tried to fan the smoke away from their mouth. If there's one thing that's definitely Vickie's weakness, it was air impurities! And smoke inhalation!

Once all that shit cleared, though, there was no kids and, more the fuck importantly, no hat. Instantly, they felt an absence on their head, and they patted their head as their eyes widened. Rather than that lovely cap, it was instead a messy shock of short emerald green hair with (presumably dyed) orange streaks. "Wh-...WHAT? Thieving little...I'll....I'LL..."

Vickie was close to having an aneurysm, but Marlon, helpfully, kept them from busting a vessel. Their eyes fell onto Aquaman, then to the grate, and Vickie bounded towards the opening, wordlessly.

Just before they slipped into the sewer (rather gracefully), they grabbed onto the side of the hole and clung there as they pointed upwards, towards Marlon. Sternly, they said, "Follow at your own risk, shirtless one. A sewer-oriented quest such as this one is fraught with danger and the unknown, and there's absolutely going to be casualties, likely many dead children, the end of it."
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Gordy
 Posted: Jun 16 2017, 03:20 PM
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The Worst Trainer
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 2038
Joined: 30-December 15
Age: N/A
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Awards: 3





Oh shit, Marlon forgot to put on a shirt that day. Which was pretty common amongst the people of Humilau, since it was almost perpetually summer there. But that was something he forgot to think about when he came to Nacrene?

So wait, why was he in Nacrene in the first place?

"Wait for me, bro!"

Marlon drew a Poke Ball, then hopped right in after the Vickster. Water and Flying, the two were both weak to Electric. But together, they could make a great team!

"We're gonna need my Starmie, Star-Bro. It can be our flashlight."

Oh, speaking of flashlights! Marlon climbed a ladder back to street level. He waved a hand over to the Raichu. "Wanna come join us in the sewer?"
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Kaleb
 Posted: Jun 19 2017, 10:57 PM
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Anti-Fun Brigade
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 494
Joined: 29-December 15
Age: 24
Location: inside your heart
Awards: 1





Regardless of anyone else's intervening, the Phantump and Accompanying Child flee into the depths of the sewer, a mix of deep, throaty cackling mixed with childlike giggling filling the underground maze. Did they go this way? That way? How will ANYONE ever be able to navigate this place without some kind of - oh hell someone wrote LAIR THIS WAY -> on the ground with pink chalk. Guess they didn't wanna get lost.

From further down (in the direction the chalk points to), sounds can be heard.

"DID YOU SET THE TRAPS, CHEL."
"Yes, sir! All set set set!"
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Gordy
 Posted: Jun 20 2017, 04:27 PM
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The Worst Trainer
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 2038
Joined: 30-December 15
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Awards: 3





Marlon ducked into the tunnel, joining the Vickster in the dingy poo-water.

He pressed the front button on his PokeBall, releasing a Pokemon before them. His Starmie let out a "HYAA!!" sound, and its gem started to illuminate the path before them.

Oh, there was a sign! Maybe that was a clue?

Marlon turned to The Vickinator and said, "I think we should follow that arrow; I heard voices coming from that direction."
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Team Ventus Vickie
 Posted: Jun 20 2017, 10:48 PM
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Leader of Team Ventus
Group: Team Ventus
Posts: 59
Joined: 12-December 16
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Awards: None



Yyyeah, it's real unfortunate that this was a sewer. Dirty and smelly, but luckily, Vickie's shoes and pants were all from a thrift store. Won't hurt to burn them later.

Either which way, they squinted through the darkness for all of two seconds, but any sight issues were rectified once HYAHstar lit up the grody pisszone. Vickie gave a nod towards Marlon, rumbling, "Good idea. I appreciate the light as well, remind me later to talk to you about dutiful employment within the ranks of Ventus."

Then they began to fucking book it. No motherfuckers are gonna get away, NOT TODAY. NOT WHEN YOU TRY TO PISS WITH VICKIE.
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Kaleb
 Posted: Jun 26 2017, 12:11 AM
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Anti-Fun Brigade
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 494
Joined: 29-December 15
Age: 24
Location: inside your heart
Awards: 1





As Vickie and Marlon progressed through the stinkmaze, they may have felt a presence watching them. A shadow within the shadows, invisible eyes following their every move...

The tunnel marked by the arrow eventually opens up to a larger room. Pipes ran along every wall, down four different hallways. While the sound of water rushing through the pipes was loud, there was another sound that began to fill the room: low, female cackling.

Suddenly, the center of the room exploded into smoke. A figure dropped down from the ceiling, obscured by the fumes, until it waved a hand through and dispersed the screen. The same girl from before stood with her arms folded over her chest, laughing as she stared Vick and Marlon down.

"So," she said in a forced, ominous voice, "you fell for my trap... how foolish! The Great Ninja Chel will have to teach you a lesson!" Dipping down, Chel takes a strange stance, giving off a loud "hyoooooowah" as she does so. Suddenly, a large metal door drops down behind the two adults, shutting off the way back.

"Now you're gonna see how a real ninja works!"
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Gordy
 Posted: Jun 26 2017, 12:46 AM
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The Worst Trainer
Group: Cafe Patrons
Posts: 2038
Joined: 30-December 15
Age: N/A
Location: N/A
Awards: 3





Oh oh oh oh! Marlon knew how to handle this! He was very good at talking things out with people.

Too bad Star-Bro wasn't. Being timid in nature (get it?), the Pokemon was startled real bad by the situation. It was quick to fire off a powerful Hydro Pump from its star, right at the girl.
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